I have been absent.  I’m sure hundreds of people, including agents and editors, have stopped by the site daily and lamented my long silence.

So, I would like to apologize, and offer up the following list of possible excuses. Please select the one you personally find the most appealing, as I can’t seem to choose between them:

1. I won a trip for myself and my family (including the dog and two cats and the fish) to Europe, and have been happily immersed in good wine, excellent cuisine, and enchanting works of art.

2. I finished writing Swimming North, and in an unprecedented and serendipitous moment, a top selling agent called me up on the telephone, said she had learned about my incredible story through a prophetic dream, and offered immediate representation. Of course I dropped everything to finish up last minute revisions and has out the details.

3. In a fit of despondency, believing I would never finish Swimming North or write anything worth reading, I stepped in front of a bus. I have spent the last month in a coma. I am typing this with my toes from a hospital bed, as both arms are broken and in plaster casts.

4. Aliens abducted me. It only seemed like a few hours, but weeks of time have unaccountably gone missing.

5. The cat took over the house and wouldn’t allow me access to the computer.

6. I developed a disabling fear of my laptop and was forced to engage in radical desensitization therapy before I was able to type a single word.

7. Overcome by a fit of perfectionism, I have been working on this blog post night and day for weeks, unable to polish it to an acceptable state for posting.

8. It began with one hot buttered rum at bedtime, and progressed to non-stop drinking. My family staged an intervention, telling me they preferred my internet addiction and urging me to get back to blogging, twittering, and endlessly tinkering with my never ending rewrite.

9. I read King Bidgood’s in the Bathtub. I thought the King was onto something and gave the idea a try. Unfortunately there is no page in this house to pull the plug, and I finally had to do it myself.

10. I procrastinated. Then I felt guilty about not blogging, so I procrastinated further. I forgot the password to log in to WordPress. More guilt. So I avoided WordPress completely, for weeks.

Enough with excuses. The writing must go on, and does, along with all of the real life complications. Time to hit some revisions before bed.

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