So I’m feeling just a teeny bit lost since I finished Filling in the Blanks.  I’ve been a good little writer – I’m making my list of agents, working on my query letter, and I have several versions of a synopsis that just need a little more tweaking before I send them out into the world.  I’ve even started reading through the Gatekeeper manuscript and thinking about where its revision might take me.

But I miss the writing space I was in, even though I was in such a hurry to get out of it.  Figures.  I’ve always been a sucker for greener pastures.

The thing is, Murdoch and Yates have been a daily part of my life for several years now.  They were there before I moved into this town and to this house.  Before I started this job.  Before my oldest son started driving and the recession hit.  They were constantly with me, whether I was writing or not.  Quiescent at times, but ever present.

It’s oddly quiet in my head and I don’t know what to do about it.  The first day or two it was a relief, like ending a relationship that has gotten overly demanding.  And then you wake up one morning and start thinking, “wait a minute!  Did I do the right thing?  Was it really over?  Maybe I could have, should have, held onto it just a little longer…”

I’m one of those people who could revise and edit as long as my fingers still move and I have breath in my body.  There is always a better word, always a sentence that doesn’t flow quite right, always something a little wrong with the plot. 

Not this time, I say.  Moving on.  I’d like to commit to sending queries off today, but I know better.  For one thing, I’m ‘on call’ and a single ring of my phone could tie me up for the rest of the day and maybe the night.  For another, I’ve got two kids to get ready for back to school.  So, let’s say by the end of Tuesday.  I hereby commit to sending off ten queries, either by email or snail mail, by the end of September 26.  And if I fail in this challenge I have set for myself, well then –

I’ll set another date and try again.